We interviewed the director of MaMagazine, the first magazine dedicated to motherhood -not parenting-. The third issue has just been published and Victoria is a candidate for the "Women to Follow 2022" award. Keep reading and you will understand why…

Before MaMagazine, what was there? where were you?
I studied Journalism and started working in communication departments and marketing agencies. From there I also went on to work for many years in the recording industry, but music is not a country for women and, when my daughter started Early Childhood Education, I left it and went back to marketing. My dream was to work in the publishing sector and that's what I did: I worked in various magazines until I decided to start my own.

And why MaMagazine? Tell us how your beginnings were and how you envision the future of the project.
MaMagazine was born as a container for testimonials and reports on the impact of motherhood on our lives, on our bodies, on society... and so on! In 2021 I decided that, among so many digital impacts on networks, much of the information was lost. And I think that the issue at hand deserves a deeper reading. For this reason, I launched a crowdfunding to obtain financing and be able to publish MaMagazine on paper. Now we are going for number 3 and we have managed to make a quality magazine, far from the concept of "read and throw away" and which, issue by issue, is growing in subscribers. A desire? Continue to grow in members, go further and further. This is the first magazine in our country dedicated to motherhood and its impact, not to parenting. It is important to remember that nuance.

How has the proposal been received, what do the readers tell you? Do you also have readers?
We have readers and readers, and that is something that makes me proud. If we limit the maternal to only women who are mothers, we lose extraordinary wealth and company. Unfortunately, there are still few men who dare to talk about their experiences with their fatherhood, but every time we detect one and wants to talk... we are there to give a voice. A good friend of mine, who supported crowdfunding and will not be a father, told me that reading the first issue helped him redefine and give new meaning to his relationship with his mother. To read MaMagazine you only need to have a mother... and as far as I know, no one has hatched from a Kinder egg.

Your number 1 came out with a brutal image on the cover: an atomic bomb! Uniting destruction with motherhood, what was the message of that cover?

The new baby boom is a concept that can be summed up as a baby comes into your life and boom! It bombards you. Nothing is as it was. Nothing will be as it was. Motherhood is a turning point in life and involves numerous sacrifices, but in the long run, in the overwhelming majority of cases, it is worth it. Nothing is the same after a baby... and that's okay too. The dangerous thing is that we buy the motorcycle that we are going to be the same people after being mothers. We open that number 1 with a beautiful poem by Mara Carver called "My children" that explains it well:

“I am another woman now that I have given birth to you.
Know that I hate you, I love you, I need you, I curse you.
I am another woman now that you are,
Now that we are."

Reading Bety Friedan in "The Mystique of Femininity" (1965), this fragment resonated with me as still valid today: "because to all those full-time stay-at-home mothers who were getting older, whose children were now in college, they were starting to be a problem - they were drinking, taking too many pills, committing suicide (…). Women, they told us, can go to school, work a little, get married, take care of children for 15 or 20 years and then go back to school and work: no problem, there shouldn't be role conflicts. (...) In reality, they couldn't expect to get real jobs and professional training after having spent 15 years stuck at home..." How do you see it?
Unfortunately, the words of Bety Friedan, like those of Adrianne Rich or Jane Lazarre, are still valid decades later. In a society where the message prevails that you can achieve anything if you really want it and try even harder, frustration is the only thing you find in most cases. This also happens with motherhood. As long as there is a wage gap, as long as the burden of reconciliation is placed on women, as long as we do not launder the value of care, few things will change.

'I don't want to be a mother'. In some young people there are responsible or pessimistic principles such as not increasing the population for the good of the planet (the ecological one), not bringing new life to a world that is ending (the pessimistic one), not giving up "me" (my job position, my life social, my personal time, my physical condition, etc.). Some of your collaborators are very young women. What attitudes towards motherhood do you detect in that younger environment?
Right in the third volume of MaMagazine, “Back roads” , we approach non-maternity from different points. We include testimonials from young women and others not so much who have decided not to be mothers. Also testimonials from other women who have not been but not by choice: life has decided for them. What I detect is fear: fear of instability in personal relationships, fear of not having a stable and well-paid job, fear of not having all those things crossed off the list of things you are supposed to do before launching into training. a family… Unfortunately, I think that we do not decide freely when, how and, sometimes, even with whom we are mothers.

'I can't be a mother'. Science and fertility is an immense world that we explore with the interview with Gina Oller. But on a social level, do you think that maternity is still considered today as the maximum or only possible way for a woman to fulfill herself?
I think, fortunately, that stigma is changing. Many women defend that motherhood is not an identity that completes them and that is great. Our maternity hospitals must be desired... or not be.

I remember the humor (and the restlessness) of the documentary 'The Swedish theory of love'. With sperm banks and artificial insemination, the single-parent option is now a reality. But is being a single mother in Spain possible?
I am meeting more and more single mothers by choice. It's possible? Well, it depends on the external support they have: their family, their friends, their work and opportunities for reconciliation... and, above all, their desire. They are all happy with the decision made and do not deny that sometimes they feel alone. But what is clear is that the traditional family is no longer the only option and that is extremely enriching.

The African proverb says that "To raise a child you need a tribe." It's time to redefine the family. What is family for you?
And I agree with the African proverb. And also with what it is time to redefine the family. Sometimes family is a tremendously toxic concept. These days I read "La familia", by Sara Mesa, and my reflection goes towards that point: in this country the role of families is mystified but, as in everything, there are good families and bad families. The best things happen within a family (unconditional love and support) and also the worst (don't forget that almost half of sexual assaults on minors take place in the family environment). The family is a space for coexistence between people who have not chosen each other and, on many occasions, we feel more comfortable or have that feeling of family support in friends or close circles with whom we share parenting models, chosen coexistence or even political affinities.

Let's not forget the father, how do you think fatherhood will be in the 21st century?
What is clear, because it has been studied and demonstrated, is that the active and present role of a father greatly benefits the mental health and self-confidence of his child. Our head psychologist Marta Giménez-Dasí talks about this at length in MaMagazine.

Today I was reading that The Japanese artist Yayoi Kusama is the only woman in the top 50 of the world art market. There is a real representation of women in society: politicians, scientists, artists...
We are half the population and history is incomplete without our testimony, without our thinking, without our work and without our character. Right in Volume II of MaMagazine we address the brutal relationship between motherhood and creation. And we do so following the famous statements by Marina Abramovich, who stated the following in the newspaper Der Tagesspiegel in 2016: “I have had three abortions because I was sure it was going to be a disaster for my career. One only has limited energy in the body, and I was going to be forced to divide it. In my opinion, that is the reason why women are not as successful as men in the art world. There are so many talented women. Why are men the ones who hold the high positions? It is simple. Love, family, children... a woman would never want to sacrifice all of that." Marina Abramovic's statements set the networks on fire and provoked a flood of responses from other women artists, demonstrating through her work and her vital activism that Abramovic was wrong. But was the grandmother of the performance really wrong? Maybe yes and maybe not. Abramovic freely decided to renounce motherhood, a renouncement that continues to generate prejudice in modern societies.

Female content, female marketing, female communication… What do you think of neutral language: them, us…?
It seems fatal to me that there is a pink tax, that is, one more excuse to charge women more just for being one. It seems to me a success that the characteristics of a feminine communication are communicated or extended: communication in women is more relational, seeks to strengthen the bonds of relationships, is more empathetic, listens more, is more conversational and also more diplomatic , in general. Teresa Baró, a communication specialist, recounts in an interview in MaMagazine that, “on the other hand, a communication from men is more direct, probably clearer, more informative and not so conversational but, on many occasions, tends to monologue. They speak and they do so confident in what they say, regardless of what others sometimes think or answer. Instead, women are always worried about the effect our words will have on other people. Regarding the question of neutral language, I must say that I understand and respect it but I don't use it in my day to day. I try to use the pronoun of the majority: if we are a majority of women, I speak in the feminine.

What is your relationship with fashion?
My relationship with fashion is more comfortable than ever. I went through a decade or more of wild consumerism, buying clothes to throw away in less than a year and, little by little, I have evolved towards the opposite. I have two closet bodies: one is full of vintage clothes, which I usually buy in second-hand stores, and the other is full of “seasonal” clothes, but they usually last a long time. I have clothes in my closet that are literally older than me. I wear my mother's clothes a lot, for example. I love giving new life to garments that have already had one or more stories! And, above all, I don't like to go dressed as a uniform, with the clothes that the media tell me are essential. I want comfortable clothes, I want clothes that are as respectful as possible with the environment and that are also original.

What do you prioritize when buying a garment?
That it has a long life, that it is made with good materials and that I like it. I have an eclectic style and I don't marry anyone in this sense.

Did your way of dressing change after maternity? And after confinement? Because we know of many cases in which the bras were ousted.
I had been freeing myself from the bra for years... but now it's wonderful! I only wear bras if absolutely necessary. There hasn't been a bra ring in my closet for years (nor heels) and that makes me very happy. After my maternity I did not notice a change: the confinement had more effect. I spend so little on clothes... and what I spend I do on clothes that I know will accompany me for a long time.

You know some of our products and we are happy to collaborate with the magazine. Have you tried our haramaki , what do you think?
Well, nothing defines the haramaki better than it is a hug. Personally, the lower back is my weak point and that's where all the pain and sorrows go. I like to feel the haramaki as the hug that it is.

Victoria Gabaldón for Happy Belly Barcelona

The flash questionnaire, 12 questions about Victoria Gabaldón:

1. Do you have a nickname?
Yes. My 20-year-old friends still call me “Piwi”

2. Age.

3. Where were you born, where did you grow up?
I was born and raised in Zaragoza. At the age of 17 I came to Madrid to study Journalism... and I'm still here.

4. Who are you shortly?
I am a woman who loves to read and write. I am a mother of two children. Op2mista, resilient and very stubborn. I want to go through life light, always light.

5. What do you do?
I am the editor of MaMagazine, the first honest motherhood magazine. It is a job that fulfills me, the last gift I have given myself.

6. At what point in life are you? What moves or interests you?
I am in a moment in which I value the now very much. Yesterday no longer exists, tomorrow who knows. It exists now and in that I put all my strength.

7. If you could spend a day in the skin of another being, what would it be?
A magnolia blossom!

8. A perfect day for you is…
I like my day to day in general. But it would be perfect if it contained a good coffee with milk, a good read, a good walk and lots of hugs.

9. One color

10. One love
Many Loves

11. A song
Whoops! I have many favorites, really. It's hard for me to narrow down. Now I listen a lot to “To all my lovers”, by Rigoberta Bandini. And a classic: “People have the power” by Pa{ Smith.

12. A parting phrase, your own or someone else's.
I love this one by Frida Kahlo: "What you take care of me lasts"

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